CTOKOS Blog

Good medicine?

So, why not leave well enough alone? Do I really have the energy to make my wife feel like a million bucks? Well, caring for our relationship with loved ones is good medicine.

Having someone to love and nurture is an integral part of being human.

Having someone love and nurture us is just as important.

Life and success are much sweeter when you have someone to share them with.

What is the point of a great story without someone to tell?

Love is the spice of life!

But, what if…

But, what if your love life is not so sweet? What if you feel like you have tried everything and she is still not happy? And neither are you? What then?

There’s Bad News and there’s good news…

The bad news is that relationships do take work to maintain their quality. With time we all tend to become comfortable with each other and before you know it, we are taking each other for granted, overstepping the other’s boundaries, and just plain ignoring each other.

Now, you might be saying, but she doesn’t appreciate me. I work 70 hours a week to provide for my family and all she can do is complain about me not sharing enough of myself. Or, I can’t find a time when we are not either arguing or giving each other the silent treatment.

Well, these are real issues to talk about. But, you may benefit from letting the past go.

Previously, you may have thought you should learn from past mistakes, and this is sometimes true. But, when we get so emotional about past issues and arguments, that we are not in any mood to try to make things better in our marriage, then it may be time to forgive or at least forget.

I am in no means putting blame on one partner or the other. It takes two to tango.

But, if you are fed up with a crummy feeling every time you come home, then taking the first step or two towards making a better relationship is what you must do.

Now, your next thought is probably, hey, why do I have to be the one making the changes first? One thing about marriage, if you want to be truly happily married, you have to stop keeping score.

So, are you ready to start the first day of your NEW marriage? The one where you can’t wait to get home to your wife to tell her about your day? Where you have great vacations together? Where you always feel loved, appreciated, and respected?

Well then, let’s get started!

The Good News…

Women like certain things. Doing those things will change the dynamics of the relationship dramatically and relatively quickly.

There is much that you can do to spark that old flame in your partner, to make her feel loved, cherished and yes, like a million bucks.

NOTE: Before you read any further, take some time to think about her and what she

TRULY cares about. This step is very important in defining her preference between the many options of behavior on the list Love Actions List.

Some women love to receive presents, others just want you to sit and talk them, and others want you to respect them by helping around the house. It is important to find the right “prescription” for success.

Speak To Her Heart

By examining the evidence your wife has given you, you can create a plan of Love Actions, perfect for her. By the way, just knowing that you are thinking about her and her preferences would warm her heart. Write down the answers to these memory questions. Don’t think of whether you would want to recreate them but just write them down for now.

What did she used to love to do together, but now you do not usually have time for?

Is there something that she has been asking you to do that you have been putting off?

When do her eyes smile when you say or do certain things?

What places did she always want go, but, never got around to it?

________________________________________________________________
________________________________________________________________
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Now with those things in mind, read through the list. Check off a few ideas that closest match ideas you have above or any new ideas that are what you believe would really get her excited and happy.

Gifts of Love Actions List

□ First and foremost, I know this seems too simple, but sometimes all a woman needs is attention and time. Reconnect with her with this simple formula:

Attention + Time = Million Bucks!

Attention= Listen to her and actually think about what is important to her.

Time= Undivided. Find a place outside of the home; leave the cell phones and PDA at home. Keep in mind that you may not have REALLY listened to her in a long time, so it may not come easy. TALK to her about what she is interested in. RESPOND by asking additional questions and try to learn something new about her. Try to do this at least once a week.

Some questions to help you reconnect:

What regrets does she have and what challenges does she face?

What are her biggest fears?

What is the craziest thing she has ever done? Or wants to do?

What are her hopes and dreams for the future?

When she old, how will she measure her success in life areas of family, love, and money?

□ Schedule a weekend off from work where the two of you can go away together. Ask her first where would she like to go? Spend time walking, eating, or just lounging. Bring her shopping for a special present. Ask her what she really wants and wait patiently, saying that you want something that will remind her how special she is to you. Think back to when you were dating. Talk about why you were attracted to her and why you
fell in love.

□ Buy a card for her and write something special for her. Tell her what you appreciate about her and how much you love her. Try on scratch paper first and see how it sounds.

Think of when you were dating. Would you have just scribbled I Love You? Or would you have gone on about how she looks and smells etc. and how it makes you feel when you see her or when you are close to her?

□ Get your message across in different ways! The element of surprise can make life more fun and exciting. It also shows that you love her so much and you just cannot wait to tell her. Write sticky note and put it in her briefcase. Leave a message on her voicemail or answering machine. A little goes a long way when it is not your normal behavior. She will start to notice the change in you.

□ Make and effort to speak well of her when you speak to your friends and family. When someone asks about the kids or her business, find a way to give her a raving review or compliment. Her heart will swell and it will in her mind establish her as secure within your heart.

□ Do something new and fun together. Our busy lifestyles cause us to forget that fun is important. Instead of going play golf with your buddies, ask her to go to the amusement park or to play a game with you. Do something that you have never done before or that you haven’t done for many years. Bake a cake, sing together to the radio, play miniature golf; something not too competitive that gives you time to laugh together again.

Laughter is the best medicine for a tired marriage.

Now, write down any ideas that may have come to mind. Also, write a date a time for the chosen activities. Make sure to ask her if her schedule is clear.

Date: ____________

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Date: ____________

______________________________________________________

Date: ____________

______________________________________________________

Hopefully, you found inspiration for your upcoming days. But, if you may feel there is too much tension between you, maybe you can start slowly. The first suggestion of time and attention is usually a good start in any marriage. You may find that you need a supportive environment to get started. If so, support is here.

Support

Relationship coaches around the world are supporting and providing accountability to couples, helping them to start their living their life as they have always wanted to, but did
not know how. Once a week, time is spent brainstorming solutions to issues and problems with great results in keeping their relationship healthy and fulfilling.

Start NOW!

Please let me know your experiences and how this changes your life!

This article was written by The Physician’s Life Coach, Christie Scott, of Extreme Success Coaching. You have permission to reprint this article ONLY in it’s entirety and with this box included.
Discover the #1 reason patients sue their doctor,
email extremesuccesscoaching@yahoo.com

Did you wake up one day and look at yourself critically? Finding that your belly is enlarging or hitting a bee line due south. Is buttoning those pants becoming more difficult? Are you understanding that your years of TV and remote control, consuming snacks and chugging six packs has finally done you in, and you are featuring love handles? Would you like to get a sixpack? You’re definitely not alone and we’ve got great news for you.

If you want to vaporize the fatty tissue to reveal the muscle you should start some abs workouts. Whether you are a man or a woman, you can do better from a stronger back. When your abs are strengthened your back is also strengthened. Some simple workouts to drop off those spare tires are sit ups and crunches.

Dealing with the lower back you can try lying on the tummy. Do the leg swim movement by lightly kicking with knees and feet off the floor. Do repetitions of 15 seconds activity, resting 30 seconds.

You may want to trim salt and sodium heavy foods from your meals. It is accepted to link sodium and salt rich foods with heart troubles and risk of stroke. Sodium also results in water retention which can make love handles look even bigger. Don’t add extra salt to foods and avoid processed foods. Drinking water can also help you to lose those love handles. Water not only helps to keep the body hydrated, it also aids your body to metabolize stored fat into energy and reduces your appetite.

You should likely think about trimming your calories from alcohol. Many of us are frustrated that we can not use alcoholic beverages to replace water. Alcoholic beverages contain a lot of what is referred to empty calories which for men have a tendency to get stuck around the stomach area resulting in excessive fat. No need to eliminate alcohol completely, just keep a tally of the quantity you consume and reduce it; just as you would if you were watching what you eat.

Want to make sure your marriage doesn’t end up on the rocks before you get to the chapel? Then set a realistic wedding budget — and stick to it.

In the process of planning a wedding, budget concerns often is a source of disagreement for a couple. They may have different ideas about what kind of wedding they want, and about what they can afford. To make the wedding a truly happy occasion, it is important that the couple discusses financial constraints early.

Set A Budget And Save For It

The first tip is — discuss finances before the wedding plans begin. Everyone involved in the decision-making process needs to understand exactly how much money is available for the wedding.

To maximize that budget, you should start saving early for your wedding. Advance planning and saving will allow you to maintain or even exceed your budget, comfortably. And that will make wedding planning easier and more fun.

Get Everyone On-Board

Once your wedding budget has been established, set it aside for a few days and then review it again. This gives everyone a chance to let the information sink in. The budget review after this waiting period gives the participants a chance to verify that they understand and agree to the budget. This is vitally important, because someone who does not agree with the budget may overspend in 1 area, leaving the rest of the budget in jeopardy.

Budget Line Items

When you’ve decided exactly how much money is available for your wedding, the next step is to divide the total into budget categories, such as the venue, food and drink, bride’s attire, groom’s attire, transportation, entertainment, photography, favors, centerpieces, and gifts. It is also advisable to set aside money for unforeseen expenses.

Who Pays

Part of establishing a budget is to be clear on who will pay for what.

Shopping And Negotiating

You will need to negotiate contracts for services, and so you must know the budget for each area of the wedding. If you have allotted $250 for entertainment, look for a DJ whose rate is approximately that amount, then negotiate to ensure that you remain under budget.

It’s wise to shop around and compare prices for services. A company may come highly recommended, but if they are outside your price range, let them know why you are going to have to choose another company. You may be surprised at how willing they will be to give you a better offer.

Substitute Creativity For Cash

Doing things on your own is another way to stay under budget. Homemade invitations or making your own favors or centerpieces can greatly reduce the wedding cost, freeing up funds for other areas of the wedding.

Do not fall into the trap of viewing your budget as restrictive. Instead of thinking about what you can’t afford, focus on how you can make your wedding and reception truly unique. You will be inspired to create a wonderful, memorable wedding regardless of your budget constraints.

Anticipate The Unforeseen

Realize that there are bound to be snags along the way. If you go over budget in 1 area, you will need to cut the budget in another area. As long as you stay aware of your spending and realize the ramifications of all your actions, you can roll with the punches and alter your plans to accommodate any needed changes.

Make It A Wonderful Memory

A wedding budget can cause emotional strain on a couple and their relationship. It is important for them to discuss their finances and establish a clear budget for their wedding plans. Doing this early in the wedding planning process can help the couple to avoid conflict during the planning phase of the wedding. It can also make the wedding more fun for everyone, and start out the marriage on a positive note.

After all, working together is what a marriage is all about.

Visit Wedding Ideas to learn more. Ron King is a full-time researcher, writer, and web developer. Copyright 2005 Ron King. This article may be reprinted if the resource box is left intact.

As brides and grooms are getting married at an older and more mature age many of them are opting to pay for their wedding. While paying for your own wedding can be expensive, it is a fantastically liberating experience. Regardless of who pays for the wedding, you or your parents, it is a significant financial commitment. The best rationale to pay for your own wedding is that you do not want to compromise on how, when and where you get married and you are ready to pay for the whole thing on your own.

The typical cost of a wedding is more than $20,000. Therefore, paying for your wedding requires a significant financial commitment. The sooner you start planning and saving for your wedding, the more advantage you have. The average time between the engagement and the wedding day is 12 to 18 months, which provides you an opportunity to plan and save for your wedding.

The most significant task you have is to establish the total amount you want to spend on your wedding. Then, divide the amount by the number of months to determine how much money you need to put aside each month to meet your goal. If you estimate that your wedding will cost $20,000, and you have two years until your wedding, you need to save about $834.00 per month.

Reasonably, not everyone can put aside over $800.00 each month. Therefore, if you cannot save enough money to cover all the costs, you may need to start cutting costs until you come up with a figure that you can meet. In addition to cost cutting, your dollars can go far by saving on everything you do. You can save by taking your lunch instead of going out, spend less on clothes and entertainment. An even better option is to take on a part time job to help you with your budget. You have many options; you just need to figure out the one that best works for you.

Opening a savings account dedicated to your wedding may help enforce the need to save. Even if you start with a small amount, a savings account should help you make the right spending and saving decisions. You can find ways to save money by researching as much as you can about the products and services you need for your wedding. The more educated you become about prices, the more you can bargain with vendors to make sure you get the best possible deals.

Wedding Favors
Wedding reception favors personalized, wedding candles, favor bags.

Let’s talk about writing love letters.

Not candy coated pap. Not romance novel fantasy crap. Not “chick” stuff.

Real love letters.

Years ago I asked my first coach if he would write an endorsement for me. This is what Drew Rozell wrote:

“Laura is truth. Laura is love.”

Whoa.

That was a lot for me to take in. I mean, substitute your own name up there and sit with it for a while. It’s a lot to live up to.

So, I wasn’t sure the world wanted truth and love. And I wasn’t all that sure that I wanted to lay my heart out to you like that. So I splashed in those fun waves where no one has to worry about drowning, (like teaching folks how to write websites, identify their niche markets, brand their businesses, or organize their time, and get some balance in life…)

And then someone asked me a few months ago, if I could teach her to watch ants. (which, of course, planted the seed for this very blog.)

Not increase profits, or get more stuff, or be more famous or popular or powerful.

To watch ants.

And my heart started to perk up … was this permission to go THERE?!

And then one of the dearest people I know lost her husband.

She is my age, 42. It is not for me to share her story here but I will tell you it was sudden.

It was a 4 a.m. knock at the door.

It was “No we can’t let you look at him.”

It makes me cry even as I type this.

So, I was sitting across from my own husband the other night. We haven’t missed a dinner together in months now, no matter how late we work or how late we eat. We know a wake up call when we hear one.

We were sitting there and I shared how my friend was doing and he took a bite of his food. The food was excellent. The kind that makes you close your eyes and turns off every other sense. And then his eyes welled up and he talked about the tsunami and all those kids who have been devastated with losses of their parents. Scott works in pediatric rehab and they have had a rough year. Several deaths and stories that have become increasingly tragic.

And his tears were of gratitude and humility. That we are alive. That we have each other. That we could sit and have an amazing meal.

We don’t deserve it. Let me go on record saying that I don’t think anyone deserves a damn thing. I don’t, you don’t. I think the word “deserve” is one of the most destructive forces on the planet but this is not the place for me to go off on THAT little tangent.

In the middle of Scott’s expressing his appreciation and his love for me I could feel he was SO present and I had this flash. For a moment I thought, “Oh my God, he’s going to tell me he’s dying.” I was wrong. I didn’t get any bad news. But, you know something? One day one of us, if we are lucky enough to have advance notice, will have to do just that. And we are going to have to figure out how to say good-bye.

Jack Kornfield, in one of my favorite books, A Path with Heart, shares a spiritual exercise in which we are to perceive everyone in the world as an Enlightened Being, a Buddha if you will. Yes,even the guy who cut you off in traffic, and your mother-in-law, your evil boss (oops, you ARE the evil boss? sorry)…everyone. And they all “get it” and we are the only ones who don’t. Our job is to figure out what they are trying to teach us.

I’ve seen a whole lot of death around me the past few years.

And I know a lot more is coming.

Everyone who is dying is teaching me that loving someone means you get the whole package. When you marry someone, or develop a true friendship with someone you are agreeing to go the distance. THE distance.

As Paul Simon would say, in his most excellent CD on relationships, You’re The One,
“Ask somebody to love you, it takes a lot of nerve.”

No kidding.

When we accept someone in to our hearts, regardless of the relationship, we aren’t just saying, “Will you share my life with me?” We are saying, “Will you share my life with me and love me knowing full well that you will have to let me go one day? Can you go THE distance with me?”

And while I have been letting myself stand in the reality of this fact, I have been witnessing a lot that makes me want to grab people and shake them silly.

I see people looking for mates like it is some kind of a job interview. I heard someone express concern about marrying a woman, who he was afraid tended toward anorexia, because he wasn’t sure she was always attractive enough, especially when she didn’t wear make-up.

Before you blow a gasket, let me tell you this is someone that has a really good heart and that I like very much. I know where the pressures are coming from that led him to say this because he has suffered the same kinds of rejection himself. Rational or not, loving or not, I understand that he would be hesitant to make himself even more vulnerable to rejection by being with someone who isn’t perfect. It makes all the sense in the world to me. It’s fear. We all have fears and they make us do and say crazy things. And don’t try to tell me you’ve been immune. I know better. It may show up in how we assess potential mates: What will others think if I am seen with this person? Are they attractive enough? Wealthy enough? Witty enough? Will they represent me well? Is this the perfect ornament for me?

It may show up in how we relate to ourselves.

I was at a Grand Opening of a boutique and several area business people were there. I overheard this exchange:

“What do I do? Well, I make women beautiful.”

“Oh, you must be a plastic surgeon.”

“Why, yes, I am.”

And then I saw woman after woman asking if they need botox yet. No thought as to whether someone shooting botulism into you is a good thing. There was no “if” in that sense. The “if” was simply a question of timing. THIS is what we have to do to be beautiful?!?!?

Again, I see where this comes from. Look in any magazine or television show. Makes sense that everyone feels so insecure.

Can I just say something, though?

For the love of God, people! Snap out of it!!!

Seriously!

Get a grip on the fact that we are human. We get old. We die.

The question is, do you want to spend all your time and money trying to run from reality pretending that somehow you have been granted special immunity from the 4 a.m. knock at your door or hearing really bad news from a loved one or are you willing to wake up and face this square in the eye and NOT SHRINK BACK?

Like I said, I’m not going to get all touchy feely with you here. I have a picture of Samuel L. Jackson looking down on me. I used to have a lovely calligraphy that translated into “Calm”. I took it down. I am not calm. I’m not mindlessly floating around in an illusion. I’m not here to stay comfortable and to preach a little “I’m okay, you’re okay” at you.

Psst…Hey, Laura, I thought you said you were going to write love letters?
Um…this doesn’t seem that loving to me…I mean..”

Au contraire, my friend. I’m saying this precisely because I DO love. You see, once you look at someone through eyes that allow you to face their impermanence in your life…once you REALLY get this…you will get very clear very quickly on what being in love with someone really means. It’s not about ornamentation and earning potential. It’s about embracing the fundamental, essential humanity that is common to us. It’s about showing up with no mask on. It is the scariest and most beautiful thing we can ever do.

I’ve given you much to absorb here so I’ll leave you know to pour another cup of tea and maybe you might want to pick up a pen and a paper and just start with this sentence:

“I don’t know how long I will get to be with you, so while I have you here there is something I want you to know about what it means to have you in my life…”

Laura Young is a personal development and business coach. She is a contributing author to A Guide to Getting It: Purpose and Passion and Become Your Own Great and Powerful: A Woman’s Guide to Leading a Real, Big Life. She has recently been featured on By, For and About Women and Artists First Radio. To learn more about her, visit http://www.wellspringcoaching.com

To visit Laura’s blog, visit http://antwatching.blogspot.com

Owning a glass rack and glass truck is not the same as purchasing a different piece of glass handling equipment. As the glass manufacturing industry specializes, the handling tools that surrounds it, makes improvements at the same time.

The effective, controlled distribution of flat glass and its ancillary services, created the numerous types of glass truck rack configurations to meet these needs.

Because of the huge array of routes available, an informed due diligence considering your businesses base-line specifications is very much needed to purchasing a glass truck. However anyone can buy a standard glass truck and rack from the biggest manufacturers, for no or little extra surcharge you get a fully-customized glass rack designed to your jobs exact requirements.

Coming up with a few requirements in a few ways will help you select the body and chassis tandem that will maximize your investment.

Keep in mind that bodies should outlast two and sometimes three chassis. Planning that far in advance demands a bit of work because the glass rack body must be remounted to a specific chassis type design. The chassis type will also dictate necessary features of the body configuration like rack size, ledge width, and payload.

Most glass racks are common in 3 fundamental materials: aluminum, stainless steel and carbon steel. They all comes with advantages and flaws.

Carbon Steel is the cheapest rack type, but it will probably bring with it unnecessary maintenance expenditure to keep it in good shape and clean, especially in corrosiveweather conditions.

Aluminum racks are popular for their lightweight features. if painted or anodized, it will keep its shine up to a decade with just minimum maintenance. The material cost quite a bit more and are more troublesome to fix than steel.

Stainless Steel is the best choice for glass workers concerned with durability and anti-corrosive materials. If gauged properly, a steel glass rack can provide a years of just basic maintenance and enduring service. Since a stainless steel glass racks rust resistant composition, etching the faade for painting is hard, and so the glass rack bodies are not painted. A brushed finish aesthetic is the steel glass racks best look. The only one downside of steel so far is its high investment price tag.

BPH, or benign prostate hyperplasia, is a standard medical term for a swollen prostate. This means that the prostate gland, a gland which envelops the urethra and is situated below the bladder, swells and may impair or perhaps even stop the flow of urine. The prostatic gland grows with age and as a result can create complaints for example troubles passing water, weakened urinary flow, and also urinary retention. Frequent night time urination and even infections of the urinary system are further symptoms which may arise due to an enlarged prostatic gland. Enlarged Prostate - What Does that Mean? Benign Prostate Hyperplasia is thought to be a common problem of men in their sixties. A yearly examination is suggested for males over 50, regardless of the presentation of any problems, to help sustain better prostatic wellness. Inability to urinate or the presence of blood whilst passing water is a sign to seek swift medical treatment.

Surgical operations and the use of drugs are standard treatments for benign prostate hyperplasia. Regrettably, surgical operations may lead to further problems for example impotence and incontinence. An alpha blocker or drugs to shrink the affected prostate may also be prescribed for better prostate gland function, however, medications often result in undesirable side effects. Which alternatives are recommended?

Swollen Prostate Symptoms? The Natural Way to Gain a Healthier Prostate

To assist in the reduction of the symptoms caused by prostate gland enlargement and to encourage better prostate gland health, various remedies can be recommended. African pygeum keeps down inflammation, easing many of the more annoying symptoms. A product of the fruit of a tree native to southern Africa, African pygeum has been employed on a large scale by the Europeans for many years as a therapy for better prostate gland health. A decrease of fats in the diet may help, as well as increasing exercise, the pressure in the prostate gland can be lessened by ejaculating more frequently, and avoiding sitting for a long time. Using non prescription anti-histamines and even decongestant drugs can exacerbate the symptoms of an enlarged prostate, therefore take these sparingly. Reducing coffee and additionally alcoholic drink, avoid drinking near retiring this can keep down nighttime visits to the toilet. Prostate health can additionally be improved with other natural remedies which are the herb saw palmetto, starflower oil capsules, selenium, and also lycopene, a chemical found in tomatoes. Before commencing that holistic treatment regime please talk over your intention with your physician.

Wedding anniversaries are special events. Especially those big ones that mark 10th wedding anniversary, 20th, 30th, 40th, 50th anniverary .

On that special day, you can take time off to reminisce the past. You can take a look at your mementos starting from your first date. Do dust off the photo album and go through pictures of special occasions such as your wedding day or delivery of your newborn child. You can play the video of your wedding day or dress up in your wedding clothes. Maybe by now they are too small or tight for you.

On this day, you stop and reflect the state of the union between husband and wife. Then it hits you so hard that you have actually spend so little time on your dear spouse. Why? We have got to concentrate mind and soul on our careers and slog hard from morning to night at the office. By the end of the day, both partners are tired and too exhausted to talk to each other. Then your attention of focus will be on your kids. You have to take care of them play with them ,feed them, monitor them and supervise them . You have to check whether they have eaten , bathed and done their homework.

Then you have to worry about finance . Whether you have enough money to pay bills ranging from housing, car loans, groceries, clothes, school fees, It’s enough to kill the joy of marriage.

But on the other hand , you can reflect on the positive, such as overcoming problems and obstacles through strength and perseverance

Both partners should share something in common. Shared experiences makes a lot of difference. Here are a few examples.Saving money to buy your first house. The two partners deciding where to live, and what kind of house to live in.

The couple can find delight in sharing tasks together. I remember taking care of my baby son. He would cry in the middle of the night wanting either to change diapers or to be fed. We would turn turns looking after baby. She would be tired after attending to his night time needs after one or two days. I would then take care of baby on the subsequent nights.

We go to church together to worship the Lord and it’s such a wonderful spiritual experience every Sunday. We also go to the gym and workout together.

Both partners need to have same mindset or similar interest. Both my wife and I enjoy going to the movies, love children and enjoy traveling.

What similar interest do you have as a couple ? Find out what similar interest both of you have. Is it a particular kind of food, movies, travels?

And when baby comes along , make sure you also have some time to spend on your own. Ideally, you could get your parents or parents in law to help take care of baby.

On this special day, take time to reflect what both of you wanted to do together but never got down to doing it either due to work or family commitments. Find out what he or she likes . If she is fond of good food then bring her out for a good scrumptious meal at a expensive restaurant . If she likes shopping then bring her out to her favorite shopping mall and help to buy dresses and whatever she likes ( something like Richard Gere bring Julia Roberts out in ‘ Pretty Woman’ and deck out her in designer fashion wear) She may like you to serenade to her with a beautiful song or poem. Lastly, a bouquet of flowers work wonders too.

Software development is a risky business.

Many software developers are barely skilled at their trade, much less at business. They can’t understand how your business operates - and their code isn’t unreliable.

It crashes constantly.

It isn’t professional.

It hurts your business.

If you want software developed for your business, what can you do?

You need a software development professional - a consumate bussinessman, and you need to deal with him on your terms. How can you do that?

First, you need to make sure that you find a professional who understands business - your business. He has to listen, and be cautious before giving advice. If he tries to drop a pre-packaged solution on you, drop him. Make sure he charges by the project, not by the hour - hourly rates are great for developers, but not for clients. Hourly rates mean they get paid *more* for every bug they create - so they create as many as they can.

Once you have chosen a developer, the next step is to come to an agreement on what needs to be done. Don’t worry about the particular technology used - the developer should worry about that. Worry about what you need on your end - and stick to your guns! You know your business best, and your developer should respect that.

After you have an agreement, you get a contract signed, and then the real fun begins. Insist that your developer give you regular progress updates - including early versions of the software (called ‘builds’). That way, bugs can be detected early, and there will not be any surprises when the project is over. Depending on the project, you may be able to get a build every few days, or every week. The more frequent, the better.

When the project is finally over, you get to take a deep breath. Relax. Sip champagne - or Heineken, if that’s your thing. Don’t get too relaxed, though, because you will have to start the process over again soon. Business is constantly changing, and your software has to evolve with your business. That’s good, though, because every project makes your business more profitable, and more profit in less time is always a good deal.

About The Author

David Berube is a software developer and IT consultant solving business problems. He’s also a prolific writer and speaker. If you’d like a powerful, innovative developer, check out http://www.berubeconsulting.com.

djberube@berubeconsulting.com

Gniche Wedding Invitation Sites Taking Over Wedding Invitation Market

Every bride wants her wedding to be unique, so she will go to great lengths to make sure her dress is an original and her centerpieces are unlike any she has ever seen.

But what about her wedding invitations? Brides are continually searching for quality wedding invitations that have an original theme and aren’t generic.

Carlson Craft and Birchcraft are considered the Wal-Mart of wedding invitations and every bridal shop and wedding invitation site seems to be an affiliate. However, new wedding invitation sites are entering the market and they seem to be becoming Carlson Craft and Birchcrafts’ worst nightmare even with little or no affiliates.

VegasWedlockInvitations.com is an example of this. VegasWedlock Invitations sells Las Vegas Wedding Invitations and the owners were practically bombarded with desperate brides before their site even went live.

Simply put, these brides didn’t order from Carlson Craft and Birchcraft because their wedding invitations were too generic. These brides were getting married in Las Vegas and wanted Las Vegas themed wedding invitations. Even though Carlson Craft and Birchcraft have a few Las Vegas wedding invitation choices, brides told VegasWedlock that Carlson Craft and Birchcrafts’ Las Vegas themed wedding invitations were were “cheesy” and too general.

VegasWedlock Invitations have taken the term “gniche wedding invitations” seriously. Not only do they have the largest selections of Las Vegas wedding invitations in the world, but they go the extra mile and create Las Vegas themed wedding invitations for nearly every wedding location on the strip, including the Little White Wedding Chapel.

While searches for general wedding invitations is still popular, over 200,000 searches per month, gniche wedding invitation searches are quickly gaining speed. The term “Las Vegas wedding invitation” alone has over 2,000 searches per month. The term “Beach wedding invitation” has over 6,000 searches per month. These might not seem like a lot, but when Carlson Craft and Birchcraft only have half a dozen invitations to accommodate these searches, brides are craving a gniche site with more variety in their specific area. These are just two search terms out of the thousands of gniche wedding invitation sites out there. Every state in the United States has nearly 200 brides searching per month for wedding invitations related to their home towns.

The owners of VegasWedlock will soon be starting another site for Beach invitations and will move onto other gniche areas in order to satisfy brides’ tastes for more specifics.

To view VegasWedlock’s Las Vegas Wedding Invitations, go to their site at http://www.vegaswedlock.com.